everytime he looked across the room at me my bones would colapse. i fell on the floor.
like some old building in a hurricane.
walking home was always a conversation with me, building confidence.
whenever i reached home i felt safe.
he was far.
he would never take anything else from me again.
next day i would go out, tie up chains around me. put a lock on everything.
talking to people behind a wall of steel.
listening, responding while fixing every crack in my wall.
myself was all i had.
from all the people around me i chose myself.
from all the love i had i chose my own.
i became my universe and fantasy.
my safety and my courage.